My Evil Twin

To be fair, he probably isn’t evil.

I have a twin. He is my beach twin. I see him on the beach, all the time, and it’s STARTING TO GET WEIRD!

Today was a perfect example, and adequately illustrates how our relationship continues to develop.

Today, I arrived on the beach at about 11.30. I love going to the beach. I spend a lot of time there in the Summer Holidays. It was a lovely day. I had music, a good book, it was a gorgeous day; I was very content. About midday, HE APPEARS. He wanders down the beach, he has a swim. He sits about 20 yards away, nearer the water, he remains there for about an hour. Then off he goes.

Nothing weird about that.

EXCEPT I SEE HIM ALL THE TIME.

Later, after leaving the beach, wandering into town, etc, etc... I return to the beach. The seafront is essentially my walk home, so I tend to walk along the beach as it’s a pretty walk. I decide to sit down for a while, as it’s still so warm. I’m on a different bit of beach now, further up- so I sit down relax, look around me...

THERE HE IS AGAIN. He was there first, clearly. I just hadn’t noticed. A different bit of beach a few minutes away. But THERE HE IS.

Nothing weird about that though. A coincidence, that’s all.

But this happens ALL THE TIME. Different bits of beach, different times of day. In term time, I often nip to the beach late, sort of 4.30/5.00ish – he’s often there, irrespective of which bit of beach I’m on, and it does vary.

And now it’s the holidays, I’m camped out during the day- THERE HE IS AGAIN. Different bits of beach again.

How is this happening? It is too wild to be a coincidence. Superlativity has seen him too. It’s not just me being crazy. He’s my witness.

Anyway- so now it’s got to the point of being weird and frankly ridiculous, and I wonder ‘Does he recognise me when I clock him?’

Who knows... I sort of feel like I should talk to him now. I don’t know why precisely, it just seems like it would be the right thing to do in such an odd situation, where we continually run into eachother on such a random and regular basis.

AND SAY WHAT EXACTLY?

“HI!!!  WE BOTH LOVE THE BEACH!  BEACH BEACH BEACH!!

 MuRRRRRrrrRRRHHH!  MRRRHHuuUUuRRRHHH!”

“Fuck of you little freak.”

Exactly.

Perhaps... perhaps it IS just a coincidence, but none of it adds up. Sometimes I’m there first, sometimes he is. Sometimes it’s one bit of beach, sometimes a different bit, or a different bit again. Sometimes it’s 11 in the morning, sometimes it’s 5 in the afternoon.  Sometimes it’s 3 in the afternoon. 

It CAN’T be a coincidence.

Therefore he must be my evil beach twin.  He is kind of hot.  Sets of my gaydar just a tiny bit. Nice body, tasteful tattoo, bleached tips.

Great tan.

Maybe it’s the heat haze creating a mirror effect?

This is my BeachTwin. Not a normal twin. We don't look alike. We have a 

similar look, perhaps, but we are twins only on account of integrated beach use.